There is a saying that we can’t love someone else until we love ourselves. One can say I love myself so I can love. Once in a relationship tho you may begin to have trauma come out, insecurities creep in and the overthinking can ruin a relationship. I’m guilty of these things and I’ve never really put the work into myself like I wanted to believe I had. I thought I was healed I thought this will be easy to live someone fully without question. Well it’s hard you can’t because I learned that I had a lot of issues I hadn’t handled. The reason I didn’t handle them was because I really didn’t know I had them or what they were until I really became open to myself and was willing to learn and heal. My attachment style brought out and shone the light out of why I was acting certain ways and driving my husband crazy. If you want research this it will help you I’m sure. It even helped me understand my husband and why he’d react to things I was doing. It was a game changer for me. I’ve learned a lot about irrational fears and I just need to relax.

We are alway in such hurry all the time you need to take time and enjoy the moment. Being in a long distance marriage I don’t have luxury of seeing my husband everyday so when we get together we should let take that time to fight or solve every problem our lives are facing we talk daily and can handle those problems then. When we come together on a trip it’s about enjoying each other and the moments. I haven’t been successful at this I set expectations and if it doesn’t go like that then I get disappointed but why I have no clue. I think it’s just you get so worried about things being perfect you get upset if it doesn’t happen like your mind but in reality it was just as good.

On this trip I had no expectations because I knew that was going to ruin the experience. This time I’m all in just enjoying the moment just whatever happens is good. I can say without a doubt I’ve felt more peaceful I smile because I’m here with my husband. We don’t have to do anything or be out spending lots of money. My time with him is priceless and that how I’m treating it. I’ve learned to enjoy this peace it’s made me appreciate my husband. I hope this continues as it has helped in our relationship and will strengthen the bond. So you do hav to love yourself before you can really love someone else!

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